To blog or not to blog, that is the question

Chickens and Stuff

2005-06-24T21:00:00.000-07:00

So here we are again all revved up post holidays. Feeling fine and happy to be back in the dirt and gardening once again. The Black Hills in South Dakota were awesome would recommend going there to anyone looking for a vacation destination, lots to see and do. Doesn`t matter how old you are there is something for anyone.
We had some stresses pre trip, our stupid chickens started to peck one another to death. Hense the term "hen-pecked". It sure drove us crazy because you go check on them and they are all pecking one hen until it was bald and bleeding. Then we had to do away with the poor beaten thing because it was sufering and half dead anyway. We started with 9 birds and we are down to 3! What is going to happen? there will be one hen left and she`ll peck herself then. I asked the farmer who sold us them, and he said this sort of thing happens some times and yes they can even peck themselves. It upsets the kids to see the bloody battered picked on hen but oh well part of life and they realize a new lesson about the animal kingdom. The fittest usually survive or in this case the most stupid aggressive one survives.
So, the mosiquitoes have been relentless since the beginning of June, one goes out to just sinply see how hot it is and the darn critters bite you until you can hardly stand it. Do any of you get these wee ferocious varmints in your part of the world? I swear that when I get to heaven that will be one of the issues I have with the Lord, why in the world did He create these creatures. All they do is wreak havoc on all of the warm-blooded creatures like me and the animals. So, with that said I have an almost 10 year old son breathing down my neck begging me to end this blog so he can go on the net and look up something re: Lord of the Rings, drives me crazy. Oh well could be worse, catch ya all later.

Gardening and Trips

2005-05-21T00:55:00.000-07:00

Its that time of year again and I`m nutso trying to plant everything in site. At least this year I wasn`t outside planting the day of my daughter`s birthday party. I actually stayed focused and attended all the little kids quite dutifully. I must tell you those parties do me in. So much work for a couple of hours of complete frenzy. I hope she enjoys it, I sure am glad when its all over. Anyway we leave on a trip to the Black Hills in 2 weeks. I`ve never been, and I`m looking forward to going. There sure is a lot to see and do down there, we`ve been researching and have been amazed at the endless amount of fun activities we can participate in if we can afford it. Everything costs money. I`m starting to wonder if even the buffalo will have signs around thir necks saying $2.00 for a picture, yikes! My friend who I mentioned awhile back has miraculously been healed of her lymphoma cancer. Praise God for that. So back to my gardening, it`s 3a.m. and I`m wasting away here at work with complete exhaustion since I didn`t nap before my shift, because I had to go pick up some more plants at the greenhouses around here. I was hoping to save time when I get back home so I could just get planting. The weather man is forcasting a torrential downfall today so all my running around may have been useless. Hope you all are well, gotta go.

Mother`s Day

2005-05-08T19:50:00.000-07:00

I feel awful you guys said such nice stuff about me it makes me want to blog some more. I know I haven`t been around much lately but life has really been busy. Then when I get to work I`ve been so busy delivering babies that on my breaks, if I get a break I just want to rest, so that`s why I have not been around.
Today is Mother`s Day and I`m at work helping women become mothers. I wrote an article in our little local paper. It was a competition for Mother`s Day and surprise I was one of the stories that was picked. I`m going to try and scan it and some how get it on this site, or I`ll just type the entire thing out for you all. You don`t have a choice you have to read it.
Well I cannot figure out how to scan it and I actually left it at home, so I`ll improvise and give you the bit that I remember.
Learning How to Live

When I was a little girl I was like most girls and I played with dolls. I dreamed that one day I would become a Mommy and believed that this dream would come true. When I was a young adult I became the parent critic, judging every move that parents made and secretly judged them knowing my ideal way of parenting would reign supreme.
Well the day finally arrived when I actually became a parent. I still remember when they pulled that baby from my body and I gazed upon his dimpled cherub-like face it was love at first sight.After a very brief time with my child I quickly realized my supreme ideas were just that---ideas. I never knew what hit me. Being a parent has been the most challenging role I have and will ever play. The battle scenes that I endure seem endless. I do like to think that the joys out weigh the difficult times, but these days one never knows.
I`d like to recall a few of those moments. I remember after a particularily exhausting battle where the kids had broken every rule in the book, I tried a desperate measure and yelled"Why do you guys listen to your Father better then you listen to me?" My middle child promptly answered "Because he`s harder on us." I retorted back, " I can change that you know!" Needless to say they still listen to their Father better then me. But I can use that to my advantage too, by saying something I always vowed I never say,"Just you wait until your Father gets home!" Another such battle scene memory was when I attempted to be ever so holy and quote scripture during a war zone. It was intense so I used the tried and true"Honour your Father and Mother in the Lord for this is right", and" do you kids know that this is one of the only commands that has a promise with it? The promise is that you will have a long and healthy life." Well imagine my shock when my cute little girl without a blink of her eye replied angrily "I don`t care if I die young!" All my zest just left me and although I can laugh now there was no laughing at the time.
All kidding aside, I enjoy being a mother. Why else would I stay at home and homeschool the 3 kids? It has been the only role in my life that has molded me or forced me into becoming a better human being. It also has made me respect and understand my own mother greatly. It`s a role that has kept me on my knees and closer to my Lord and Savior.
When all is said and done, at the end of my life, I know without
a doubt, that having been a mother, I will have lived life to the fullest. They teach me daily how I should live my life. . . just like they live their lives--like a child. Here is a poem I wrote that explains my last statement.
No Wonder
It is no wonder Christ said to be like a child,
In our faith, trust, obedience and love
I watch my son, and smile. . .
As the world unfolds before his eyes
His wee life reveals an excitement
That has somehow died in me long ago.
A flower, a rock, an insect, a squirrel
His face lights up with pure joy.
What innocence, what refreshing wonder.
I envy the newness in each of his days.
No boredom, no duty, no responsibility.
When will he discover the everyday day?
Life`s disappointments? And heart wrenching pain?
Oh Lord! Please help me to save him from it all!
Teach me his secret again, Renew in me your child-like freshness,
So I may keep him forever young;
Always forgiving, always accepting, always loving.
Oh, no wonder, we must be a child once more.

Hope you enjoyed that, see ya later.

Basic Life

2005-04-16T14:03:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I sit and wonder what profound thing can I say to entice you people to read my blog and then I realize that it doesn`t take much to entice you all so I just talk about my basic life as it really is, Basic! I thought of Nettie the other day when I went into the store Fruits n` Passion to buy Darlene`s birthday present. Talk about expensive, it sure smell nice in there, I wish I could have bought something for myself too. Ended up getting her something that smells like coconut, I think her husband was excited as her when he took a whiff of the stuff. I feel sorry for you guys cause I get to actually see Darlene face to face, and you guys just get the cyber space woman. She is so much fun, one feels like they have just received a kiss from an angel after spending time with her. The other day we were quite the pair, she sat outside with a tube top and shorts, while I was fully clothed and had 2 blankets on [which her dear hubby retrieved for me]It was only 18 degrees celcius , with a nippy wind. Dar even has a sunburn already. She loves life and lives it to the fullest. I think the child-like qualities of refreshedness and her ability to laugh so freely make her a want to be with kind of person. Also, her honesty, gotta have that we live in such a world of pride and pretend, a bit of honesty keeps us humble. Enough on Darlene, onto me. Okay that`s it now not much to say about me, same old, same old.

Answers to Questions

2005-04-12T20:15:00.000-07:00

Okay I`m madder than mad, I just typed out a bunch of answers to questions and they disappeared. It wouldn`t be a big deal but I type so slow. Here`s a second attempt to Cindy-lou`s questions. The first question is answered on her blog-site
2. I have been a nurse for 20 yrs. this year, I know that is long. My favorite thing about nursing is interacting with all the different people. I really like it when I have helped someone and I go home feeling useful and worthwhile.
3.The name I think God would call me by is " Tenacious One" , since I`m such a hard learner or perhaps " Sincere Seeker", or whatever. All I know is that He calls me His own and that makes me feel like dancing.
4.If I was a song what song would I be? I chose "From a Distance" sung by a variety of singers, Bette Midler and Kathy Mattea are 2 of them. I chose this one because from a distance things can look rosy but up close I struggle really quite a lot. God sees my heart and He knows who I am, real or fake, and He still loves me.
5.I drive a dirt bike because that`s all we can afford and I don`t have my motorcycle license and therefore I cannot drive on streets, just out in the country.
There are my answers for Cindy-lou, I have yet to answer Darlene`s questions and hers are nutsy, catch ya later.

Motorcycle Momma

2005-04-04T14:03:00.000-07:00

So, with the great weather we`ve been having, i.e. anything above 0 degrees celcius, we have taken all the motorized fun vehicles out to experience the joy of freedom. Yesterday, I was reliving my teens. Here I am 40 yrs. old and I felt like a kid again speeding around the dike around our property. I was riding our dirt bike, don`t ask me the rpms. cause I don`t know. If you ask me the color, that`s another story, but its not relevant. Yes, a bunch of memories came flooding back of the days on the farm when I would whip out to the fields to see where Dad was at with the harvesting or to bring him back for supper. He never liked riding with me on the bike. I was always known as the careless or rather carefree driver. I`m constantly reminded of the time someone drove onto the yard when I was driving the lawn tractor and because I was looking the other way, waving at the company I ran into the barn. Yes, the barn, a big red hiproofed style barn, most people would have seen it but , heh, at least you can`t fault me for being unfriendly. As I was riding I thanked God for my health and the agility and ability to be able to still ride. I know a lot of women my age would stay away from a dirt bike or just get a ride on one not ride it themselves. But, heh, I`m not a lot of women. I love a challenge, the unfortunate thing about this characteristic is my children have inherited it. Especially my girls. They always look like they have survived a wind storm with their hair. If I comment on their appearance its always a "I don`t care, what I look like". They will always try to climb the highest tree, and beat anybody at anything. As I type the 3 kids are playing lego together but it sounds like there is a war going on. I thought lego was a calm creative hobby, not with my kids there is always someone beating another person in something. Oh well, onto the next topic. Like I said before we have a dike around our area. I don`t know if you were up to date on world affairs in the spring of 1997, but the area I live in is the place that experienced a huge flood. The Canadian armed forcess were inlisted to help fight off natures war with flooding. Well, after that flood a dike was built around many a home and towns. Every year a few roads are covered with water due to the rising of the nearby river. Once again we are limited to our access out of here. The road I usually jog on is covered with water. It makes for an inconveience but as long as its only temporary. I hope the water levels never reach above the dike since it was built a metre higher than the 1997 flood levels. Our home could be wrecked or worse someone could drown if they don`t evacuate in time. Well, gotta go make supper, see ya. Oh and Darlene I received your 5 questions and I will get my answers to you soon.

Spring is in the Air, Thank God for that

2005-03-31T19:06:00.000-08:00

There are so many things to be thankful for these days, I am just full of praise for our maker. Today has been a day that God has really impressed upon me His magnitude of gifts. I`ve been reading a book lately about the power of praise and it is hitting home to me what praise is all about. When I was a younger lady, my Grandma would often say to me "Count your blessings Cindy, don`t always be so focused on yourself, count your blessings and you`ll soon see how blessed you are." Well it`s taken me several years but I think I`m finally getting it. Here is a small list of some of my praise items;
The Canadian geese are flying north again, what a welcoming sign of spring.
The snow is melting.
With the melting snow, my driveway is clear and I`ve been playing some basketball with my son, making memories and having fun.
The kids have their bikes out and are tearing up and down the roads.
We made fresh cookies yesterday.
I went out for tea with a friend today, while her teen-age daughter babysat my kids for free.[nice break for me and the kids got a break from me]
My neighbor walked by our house today and saw me playing basketball with my son, and she knows I like to jog but I`m not always able because the kids are not able to stay home alone yet. So she offerred to watch them and continued to shoot hoops with my son so I could quickly go for a jog.
We got the motorized go-cart out today and whipped all around, it was fun.
We had a great tasting barbeque for supper, and were able to cook outdoors without wearing parkas.
The Wednesday night Bible study is going good.
My friend`s cancer is keeping at bay for the moment.
And the list could go on and on. I hope all of you learned to count your blessings sooner than I did, it does the heart good. Even when all seems lost there is always something to praise God for, if you have an attitude of praise. Cindy

Babies and Gardens

2005-03-27T23:34:00.000-08:00

It`s 2 a.m. and the women just seem to be pouring off the elevator in heavy labor. When it`s busy like this I always wonder what was going on 9 months ago, Valentine`s Day?, No, Christmas?, No, summer holidays? yes! Everyone was relaxed and at home or on vacation, busy making babies. I remember back in the winter of 1986, there had been a horrific blizzard, people were snowed in for 3 days or more. Nurses and Doctors were being picked up by snowmobiles to get to work because no vehicles were moving. Well everyone couldn`t go anywhere, so wouldn`t you know it, we were tremendously busy 9 months later, babies were popping out like mosquitoes on a typical Manitoba evening. Oh well at least the night goes by quicker than, I guess. My break is almost over, so I will be ending this soon.
I`m so excited that the snow is beginning to melt. I enjoy gardening a lot, I love watching the wonder of plants growing and producing. Makes me wonder if there is any correlation to my line of work, you know things growing and producing. Anyway, I have a lovely perrennial flower garden that is getting bigger. My girls enjoy picking all the flowers and I enjoy it too. If I ever get my act together and figure out how to put photos on this computer site I`ll give you a glimpse of my yard and stuff, for now, bye, bye. Cindy

Life as it is

2005-03-21T14:10:00.000-08:00

I know I have not blogged for awhile but my real, life not my fake, I`ll tell you only what I want you to hear life on the blog site, has been quite hectic. I actually have avoided blogging because I knew I would either be negative or depressing so I decided to spare anyone the emotional rollercoaster I`ve been on.
I`m leading a Bible study through our church on Wednesday nights, I of course feel absolutely inadequate to be leading but thank goodness God promises to be strong when I am weak. So really I`m not leading it He is, I`m just along to learn and grow too.
I have this stronghold of fearing man`s opinion of me or rather trying to please people due to insecurities from way back. I have dealt with a lot of crap but I still manage to fight the battle of acceptance. I know I`m complete in God but the old me still rears her ugly head and trys to convince me how useless I acually am. I long for a more peaceful state of mind but between P.M.S. and this battle life always seems to be a challenge. Oh well, gotta go cook supper and bake cookies and listen to praise music and work out. Maybe not in that order but it has to all get done. See ya, Cindy

Snow Days and Farts

2005-03-10T12:09:00.000-08:00

I don`t know about you guys but, a big event in this part of the world is blizzards. Living in the country we are hit quite hard when the weather turns ugly. Last night the winds were ferocious and some snow came down but the worse was the adverse driving conditions. Two week-ends ago 10 people were killed due to poor highway conditions. Two of those people were my sister-in-laws young cousins. They were 18 and 21 years old, a brother and sister, the brother`s girl friend also got killed. They were all in love madly with Jesus. The obituary for the young sister said she flew into the arms of her Savior and best friend. My husband said that a semi truck and 5 ton truck were in the ditch when he drove cautiously to work today.
The up side of snow days are that we country folk often get a day off school, for the kids of course. It usually doesn`t change things for me of course since I homeschool my kids. I try to keep it a secret that the other kids are off. Unfortunately they found out, and have been whining ever since. Oh well. . .
I have a sick challenge for you guys, an experiment of sorts. My husband claims that no matter where you are or who you are with if you fart and count to 20 a person will always come walk up from behind you. I have tried it and it is true. You think you are absolutely alone, you scan your area and you let one go silently because that is only appropriate in public and always in 20 seconds some one is all of sudden behind you. I guess this helps if you are lonely. The other day My husband was in an isolated corner of our local curling rink and he thought he was safe because his back was against a wall so no one could come up behind him, he was sitting with one of the kids. He had to let one go, sure enough a lady came out of nowhere and began walking straight to him. His buddies and him made this assumption in high school and have found it to be true all through life. Try it one day and report back. Unless none of you actually fart once in awhile in public. I guess it doesn`t hold true for you refine people. Cindy

Perfectly Manly Symptoms

2005-03-03T16:28:00.000-08:00

I don`t know if anyone noticed that I have not blogged for a few days, but I was sick with the flu and had a few busy shifts at work. Therefore blogging was not on my agenda. I did show this blogsite of mine to a couple of friends at work and they thought it was a scary thing that I was communicating with people I did not know. So do you feel like you are weird and fearsome? I didn`t think so. I must admit I get apprehensive about going on a chat line but this blog thing I feel safe on, you give as much information about yourself that you wish people to know.
Anyway what do you guys or girls think about P.M.S.? It seems to be the excuse for almost anything these days. I know speaking for myself that I do have bad symptoms, I come by it honestly according to my mother. Hormones seem to go out of control in our home once a month. I have it so bad that I refused to name my son certain names because his initials would have been P.M.S.. I couldn`t do that to the little guy, what a teasing he would have received one day on my blunder. I take a herbal remedy called evening primrose tablets to help ease the symptoms. I can`t tell the difference all the time, but actually I hate using P.M.S. as an excuse for everything. Some women don`t seem to mind using it as an excuse for anything they have the urge to blame it on. For instance, overeating, temper tantrums, clumsiness, absentmindedness etc. etc. I for one have a hard time accepting that perhaps its just because I made an error. My one girlfriend who suffers bad from this P.M.S. like I do once said to me that I just haven`t accepted this curse like she has. I have a hard time with it because I feel that God gives us wisdom and He intervenes for us and He promises nothing is impossible for Him so how can I take comfort in the excuse of P.M.S.. I just thought I`d throw this out there and have you people give me your ideas on the subject. It`s a big deal for me because I often feel like Dr. Jekkel and Mr. Hyde, I actually seem to change personalities for a brief period, or rather I lose control. I get upset easily at the kids and it`s not fair to them or my spouse. If it is just simply how God made me then I desire to be healed. What do you guys think?
Food for Thought, Cindy

Heaven Minded

2005-02-25T05:41:00.000-08:00

Why is it that we are not more heavenly minded? I know if I would view things in the light of eternity more than all the so called crisis`s that I face would seem like nothing. I am a highly emotional being, it is a characteristic I do not like. Over the years it has been toned down a bit, but I still react over things that would be better to just let go. I have 5 people I know that are either fighting cancer or suffering the ravages of survivng cancer and coping with the side effects of what the treatments have done to their bodies. They are all thankful focused individuals who view life in the light of eternity. Each day is a gift and they know how brief our time on earth is. I have moments where I`m like that but it shameful to admit that I all to often view things in a narrow minded "Me" scope. I know that God is helping me to look at everyday through His eyes and not the world`s eyes. Little by little everyday, little by little in every way my Jesus is changing me . . . . as the song goes. Cindy

Don`t Count Your Blessings Before They Hatch

2005-02-21T16:02:00.000-08:00

Today has been a banner day. No real explosive upsets and I felt God nudging me gently around every bend. My husband and I are trying to make some changes in the way things are done around here and I for one know that I couldn`t go on much longer the way things were. So, although I have laundry coming out of my ying yang and kids runnin about like mad, I am miraculasly at peace with the world and myself. OOOPs I spoke too soon, my 2nd born just came inside from playing wailing that her brother hurt her, so much for that 3 minute moment of peace.
As I am trying to count to 10, the kids are arguing about chores the washer is buzzing for my attention and I know my husband will be home soon hugrier than a bear. . . . Life is GRAND!! Count your blessings name the one by one , count your blessings see what God has done, count your blessings name the one by one and it will surprise you to see what God has done. Cindy

Amazon Woman

2005-02-19T15:08:00.000-08:00

I wanted to tell y`all about a true event in my life. Yes, it is another embarassing moment. I seem to have many of them. One day in summer after the birth of my 2nd or 3rd child, we decided to go to a local outdoor pool for a refreshing dip. It was dreadfully hot and everyone needed a change. The kids were newborn, 2 and 4 yrs. old. So, after packing up enough supplies to fill the titanic we were off. Everything was going quite well, hectic as usual, you know trying to be in the water with the other two, while watching the baby, breastfeeding in between and feeding snacks etc. I was getting really hot and I asked my hubby if he could watch the babe while I took a dip. He of course agreed to a break from the pool with the other kids. It was then when it happened, I unwrapped the sarong or cloth from my lower half. Therefore exposing myself, in my bathing suit, completely. I walked over to the edge of the pool and dipped my big toe in, it was cold, but I was hot so I determined in myself to go in. You see I hate getting wet and cold. All of a sudden I noticed someone watching me, I looked over and there was a 10 or 12 year old boy staring at me. I looked over at him and I noticed he was staring at my lower half. I knew I had just recently had a baby but I knew there were larger women at the pool then me. I looked down and much to my horrific eyes I realized why he was staring. I had forgotten to shave my pubic area, I looked like an Amazon woman, Pubic hair sticking out everywhere. Yikes!!!! That was one of the fastest times I got into a frigid cold body of water. To this day I wonder if I did some psychological damage to that boy. Oh well, can`t remember to do it all.
Never have forgotten to shave again though, I at least learn by trial and error, sometimes.
Cindy

Just Thoughts

2005-02-17T14:53:00.000-08:00

So, its been awhile since I last wrote something, 4 days to be exact. I will always be random because of time and my poor typing skills.
I`m finding myself heavy these days, not in the physical sense but rather in the heart sense. The idea of writing something funny just doesn`t come to me. And, yet, I usually am found where all the laughter is. No one can talk to me for a minute without chuckling over something dumb I`ve said. Being blonde it helps to add the silliness to many situations,i.e. it comes natural, although the blonde has been encouraged with some help from a bottle as I`ve aged.Now some blondes may find that offensive but heh you gotta face it, the world views us in a different light. So, I`ve stopped fighting them and I use their wrong outlook about us to my advantage rather. I know who I am and no sterotype will change that. Darlene, you can keep your comments to yourself. No, please do comment I need all the comments I can get.
The kids are all presently banned to their rooms. We were driving home from music lessons and they were fighting so much I just parked on the side of the road and silently waited until the roaring ceased. Then I went home and now they are in their rooms. I`ve been told sibling rivalry means normal children. I think a little abnormality would be nice sometimes. I`m finding the silent treatment on my part works a lot more than when I react with an emotional retort of my own. What do you mommas think? It`s that old verse in Proverbs, "a harsh word stirs up anger, but a soft word turns away wrath "
My kids are now coming out of their rooms and asking for food. I guess I gotta go. Thanx for reading my varying thoughts, catch you next time. Cindy

Ramblings on the Night Shift

2005-02-13T20:48:00.000-08:00

Here I am at work on a break typing a blog to you people. My family is already resentful of time I have spent blogging. It`s like I cannot do anything that takes time from them, that is my kids. Life has been good and also hard since I last blogged. I am realizing that I am still holding onto habits that I wish I had deleted from my life years ago. I also am realizing that no matter how much I give to others I still am selfish. In 1st Corinthians 13, it talks of true love. It says that even if you give your body to be burnt at the stake as a martyr but have not love it is worth nothing. Lately God has been pressing this point home to me. I do a lot for my family and spouse, I do alot for church and friends in need. Do I always do these duties joyfully? No! I often do them begrudgingly, complaining away as I do them. Of course I complain under my breath so others will see the glossy self-righteous side and not the real me. It makes me cringe when I realize how Pharasitical I actually am.
God desires to have me give all over to Him, but only I can surrender, no one can do it for me. Surrender that is a word that we all despise. I don`t know about you but, when I was growing up I was taught to never give up!( I have said those words to my own kids) I was also told that no one will take care of you accept yourself, so you better do it. Is it wrong to instill perseverence in our kids, to run the race with all their heart? No, i think it`s okay. There has to be a line of independence and dependence on our heavenly Father. I for one wishes that I could go into each day without getting all tied up in a knot if things begin to fall apart all around me. I know the battle is not my own, Ephesians 6 tells us about the daily spiritual battle we face. I just would like to realize the battle is occurring before I try to take charge and rather let go and let God. I have a difficult time in asking others for prayer and assistance too, making the road lonely and bumpier, and yet I have an abundance of friends. Maybe that is why I have friends because nobody likes being with a whiner. As, you can tell I am a bit down at the present time, I know it will lift. My Grandma always told me to count my blessings, so that is what I`ll try to do. My aunt sent this little ditty to me awhile back.
I`m no what I hoped to be
I`m not what I want to be
I`m not what I long to be
But I thank God I`m not what I use to be.
Cindy

Snot Queen Forever!!

2005-02-10T14:00:00.000-08:00

Since only two brave souls have shared their most embarrassing moment, I did promise to share mine. So here it goes. . .
I was about 16 years old and thinking I was pretty cool. I had boyfriend named Russel, and he played hockey for the school team. Life was grand! Then one day I was hanging out with a bunch of the hockey guys, at the rink. We were all standing in a circle, sharing stories and laughing at crude jokes. Well I had a whopper of a cold, and everytime I laughed I sounded like a car back firing. Phelgm was just bubbling up and down my throat, Disgusting! It was starting to make me feel self conscious and knew if I didn`t get control of my rude noises soon, I would be the brunt of cruel ridicule from the gang. So, I determined within myself that no matter what I was not going to snort ot gurgle next time I laughed. Sure enough it happened and I laughed, well I stifled it and laughed with my mouth closed. Before I knew what was happening the biggest most grossest snot bubble formed from my right nostril, I couln`t stop it! It just grew and grew everytime I breathed than all of a sudden it burst! Now how mortified can a teeny bopper feel with her boyfriend and his buddies all standing around. The saving grace was only one guy saw it, Cam, one of the nicest ones of the rangy bunch. He didn`t say a word until later and he too commented on the size of that bubble. He was surprised no one else saw either, they had been listening to someone tell a story and did not look my way, Praise God!
The funny thing about this story is that it was such a huge deal to me, but to this day 24 years later, I have run into Cam 2 or 3 times and he never remembers it, until I tell him. He told me to stop reminding him and soon it would be forgotten. But now that I blogged it to y`all I guess I`ll reign as snot queen for sometime.
Love, Cindy

The Present Moment

2005-02-09T15:19:00.000-08:00

Okay guys this is really bad. I am finding this blogging stuff addictive. It also helps me improve my typing skills. You do not know how long this blogging actually takes me.
My kids are finally outside playing in the freezing cold, giving me a moment to rest and take in a breath of air without answering another question or breaking up another disagreement. I`m suppose to be making supper but instead I`m talking to y`all.
A friend of mine e-mailed me the other day and talked about "The Sacrament of the Present Moment",it means being content with the ever present moment,i.e.letting go of the discontent in a lonely day and trusting God that He is okay with me at this very moment, as I am, no jobs to show my worth to the church or mankind. In light of my last blog it sure helped me see how my busy schedule might mean I have some soul searching to do. Then at Bible study today we were on chapter 3 of The Purpose Driven Life, and it spoke strongly about knowing your purpose, like what really drives you. It asked you to ask family and friends what they think drives you. I know it sounds nuts, but I know what I believe in, but do I even know what I am running around like a chicken with her head cut off? No, so I guess your prayers are leading me to look deeper, Barbra. Well that is all my ramblings for now I got to make supper and get these children off to their lessons.
Cindy
P.S. I know I was a little deep this last one, for those of you who crave silliness, tell me your most embarssing moment or moments, If you tell me yours I`ll tell you mine, and we`ll see who tops whose

Time is a precious Gift

2005-02-07T09:53:00.000-08:00

Hi guess you were wondering if I ever get around to blogging again. Or maybe the handful of readers who so graciously have taken the time to read my space gave up. Anyway, this blog is about time or lack of it. I have not blogged again because of the lack of time in my life. At this moment I have three more subjects to teach my kids,( i homeschool the rowdy bunch), I have a friend coming over for lunch any minute and the lunch is not ready, I have loads of laundry to do, I need to work-out, I have to make supper, I have bills to pay etc. etc. You may say so, why should your life be any different then the rest of society? I do not like this rat race. Yes we must Be productive to some degree, but when did schedules take over simply living life with a smile on our faces and a skip in our walk? I`m finding that I get to a point where I hate my days. I wake up and start running. Recently I had a serious talk about these concerns of mine with my lover, my mate and my friend, my husband. We both know something must change. You see when this busy life style gets to us then we bark at one another and get irritated over the littlest things. So, we are going to begin by saying no to some committments, and setting boundaries and priorizing what is important. You see when all is said and done at the end of our lives, will it really matter how much we`ve accomplished? I for one hope that at the end of my life the few love ones at my funeral will be saying how much I loved them and spent time laughing and enjoying life with them. My Grandma once said to my sister when she was lamenting over a messy house with kids mucking about, "Honey, your kids won`t remember how clean your house was, but they sure will remember how much time you played with them." I guess that is why God said,don`t worry about tomorrow, today has enough worries of their own, take one day at a time. . . . , something along that line anyway, I don`t feel like running for my Bible at the moment to clarify, it would take too much time and I have to finish this blog. C`est la vie, Cindy
P.S. I welcome your comments on how to tame ones lifesyle to an easy timefilled pace, or just your views

Life in the Full Lane

2005-01-31T22:17:00.000-08:00

So, here I sit wondering what to write on my very first blog. I feel like a kid having to recite something in front of the class for the first time. All you elite alumni bloggers reading this and commenting. But, really who cares what you think of my thoughts because that is what they are exactly, my thoughts.
It`s been a long day as usual, and the kids are finally in bed. The house is fairly clean since we just had company over. It`s nice to see friends, especially these friends they have a way of keeping a smile on our faces. Not because of the way they look or anything like that, just because they love life and live it to the fullest.
Lately it seems, at least I have found that everyone takes life way too seriously. I was doing just that the other day. I was sitting at a children`s theatre show with my kids. Worrying about seats, wondering about if I looked fat in the outfit I had on,(since I had just noticed some people I hadn`t seen in a long time), basically being self absorbed. The show had already started and this acrobat was doing his one man show, you know stunts with juggling , flips etc. I was trying to enjoy myself but I kept on worrying over the darndest things. When before I knew what was happening, the actor had my hand and I was on the stage. I heard him asking for volunteers but I was hoping he hadn`t noticed me in my too small stretchy sweats. Being that time of the bloated month it seemed a dandy choice for the occasion. Anyway, here I am with spotlights shining down on me and my sweats and this man (still holding my hand)He asks me to hold his unicycle and then he goes stands about 20 feet behind me. He now announces to the audience that he will now jump over me and land on the unicycle that I was holding in front of me. Being scared and nervous I believed him, that is that he could do this. Again before I stood a chance, his head was between my legs, I was on his shoulders and he jumped up on to the unicycle. Now, this is not what I had planned for a basic kid`s field trip. He zigged and zagged all over the stage with me wobbling precariously above him. I laughed and laughed and all my worries dissolved into thin air. I trusted him completely to not let me fall and later on thought it was actually fun. After I changed out of my sweats that is. Since I peed myself, NO,kidding I did not have an accident.
I thank God for giving me a moment of child-like silliness, where I had to lose all inhibitions and just simply be. I wish I could do that more often. I bet that is what God really wants from us, anyway, A spirit so abandoned for Him. He longs to surprise us and sweep us up into any given situation where we will trust Him entirely. Knowing that the wondrous God who made us loves us so much He wants us to live as He intended. . . . to the fullest. John 10:10
Have a good one, Cindy